彼此造就--常常赞赏你的丈夫/妻子

新约圣经常用的一个动词就是 ‘造就’，通常是指如何建立、启发，发掘个人的潜力。当我们造就/建立对方的时候，无形中也增加自己的魅力。在婚姻内，我们可以给予配偶的最美妙的礼物，就是彼此造就，彼此赞赏。

我们如何造就对方呢？夫妻应跟随圣经里的原则，正如旧约雅歌书所写的。简而言之，为夫者，应时常赞赏妻子，妻子必然以热爱来回报丈夫。

神所设计、所创造的婚姻是非常奇妙的，为夫者，心理上常常依赖妻子的赞赏与肯定，丈夫对妻子外观的看法也一定深深影响妻子自己本身的看法。妻子应常常被丈夫所赞赏所鼓励，而不该被丈夫狠狠的批评或指责。

夫妻如果时常互相指责，批评对方，无形中，就是在狠狠的伤害对方。夫妻双方应时常以言语互相激励，深情的注视对方，身体上的亲密接触，必能成为恩爱夫妻，荣神益人！

Train your Child… In One Minute a Week!
The above headline is meant as a joke (you knew that, right?).

After all, our society has become enamored with quick fixes and easy solutions as it has with speed.  Bookstore shelves are crammed with titles such as “Five Steps to Revolutionize Your Life and the 30-Second Prayer Warrior.”  We see ads that promise “Lose 20 Pounds in 10 Days.”

Unfortunately, some parents let this easy-does-it, don’t-break-sweat mindset influence the spiritual training of their children. They figure they’re doing okay if they ask a question or two about “spiritual things” during the week.

Parents who take a minimalist approach - asking a few questions or offering a few “way-to-go”s for regular church attendance—shortchange their children of rich opportunities to deepen their faith. To state this principle in positive terms, parents must be intentional, consciously spending time nourishing their child’s spiritual life and seizing valuable moments rather than letting them pass by.

For some things in life, there are no quick and easy solutions.  For all of us, growing in Christ is a long-term process. It takes diligence, discipline, and attentiveness over many years. We may sometimes experience a growth spurt—a big leap forward in our quest for Christ-likeness—but most often the maturation process happens inch-by-inch, step-by-step.

That is why wise moms and dads allow plenty of time for cultivating, nourishing, and tending their children’s spiritual development.  Perhaps that’s what the Psalmist was getting at when he said, “Our sons in their youth will be like well-nurtured plants” (Psalm 144:12).

Parents who are “Spiritual nurturers” set aside ample time to talk, pray, and read with children.

Rearing children is like baking bread: It needs to be a slow process or you end up with an overdone crust and an underdone interior.

教养儿女

诗篇144:12

“我们的儿子,从幼年好象树栽子长大. 我们的女儿如同殿角石，是按建宫的样式凿成的。”

身为父母，肩负神所托负重任，是孩子们当然属灵的导师,必须愿意花时间与孩子交谈,祈祷与阅读.。正所谓“十年树木，百年树人”养育孩子,犹如烘烤糕点,整个过程，马虎不得，更不能操之过急，否则 将会弄巧反拙！       

我们现今的社会已臻至非常迷恋，快速解决任何事舆物的地步。报章上的减肥广告词不是写著

 “不必流汗，不必运动，你绝对能够在十天内减去二十磅的体重”“如何改变您生命的五大步骤”等等；即使是属灵书架上亦充斥 着 “如何作个三十秒的祷告勇士” 等类的书籍。

遗憾的是,有些基督徒的父母也深信可以如此这般，快速,无需绞尽脑汁的速成法，向孩子们灌输有关的属灵的价值。

如果基督徒的父母以为,只要在每一个星期内，向孩子们发问一二个“属灵”方面的难题，按时带领他们上教堂作礼拜等几个 “简易方法”就能增添孩子们对神的信心,使孩子更属灵，更虔诚，那就是大错特错了。 父母应该刻意的,积极安排时间,抓紧孩子稍纵即逝的宝贵成长时光，适时地向孩子灌输良好的属灵观念。

生命里有好多事与物往往无法在极短期内快速的长大，成熟，我们需要长期不断奋斗,竭力,自律才能在基督里有所成长。有时，我们或会体验所谓“一日千里”的灵性成长,但大多数的日子,我们更需要“一步一步”艰辛的步伐，步向属灵成熟，康庄的大道。

所以,智慧的父母必须学习按部就班，尽量拨出大量的时间，精力，刻意去栽培,灌输孩子们的正确的属灵观。

Encouraging your Teen’s Faith
Here are a few ways you can stimulate your teen’s faith in God:

● Be a good example.  Because this is an age of idealism, your child is sensitive to signs of hypocrisy or inconsistency. Be honest about your failings.

● Don’t be disturbed if your child expresses doubts about their personal faith. Spiritual struggles are almost inevitable for young people. If you can’t answer a question, find someone who can--a pastor, youth leader, or counselor.

● Encourage your child to join an active Christian youth program. If your church doesn’t have one, look for a program in the same denomination or campus or organization.

● Finally, pray continually for your child.  They need the Lord’s constant protection. Remember, you may be the only person in the world praying for your child.

如何激励您家中的青少年更加爱主

●    以身作则 

新新人类响往完美主义，青少年通常不满成年人的虚伪与言行不一致，因此，家长应诚实的面对自己的短处。

●    当青年儿女质疑个人信仰时，家长千万不要为此感到困扰。

事实上，年轻人经常对自己信仰发出种种疑问，若是父母无法一一回答他们的疑问，就当向教会的牧师传道，青年领袖或专业辅导员求助。

●    鼓励青少年儿女参加教会青年活动。

参加所属的堂会或同一宗派/地区的青少年活动以及校园内的基督徒团体活动。

●   持续不断为您的青少年儿女代祷。

他/她们非常需要主耶稣的日夜看顾与保护，请记住，您可能是全世界唯一替他们代祷的人。

这篇文章由马来西亚爱家协会所提供。

若欲获取进一步详情，请联络马来西亚爱家协会., 6-2 Jalan Bersatu 13/4, 46200 Petaling Jaya, Selangor 电话: 03–7954 7920, 传真: 03-7954 7858, 邮址: focus@family.org.my 网站: www.family.org.my

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